"Now onto the second order of business. Akira has already agreed to three cage matches next month, and Daruma-san has taken on additional design work, but that only covers expenses. I think we should be spending more time on akihabara-at-deep-specific projects..."

Box tapped the back of Taiko's hand and leaned back in his chair, rolling his eyes when Taiko looked over. Page was on another leader-san kick, enthusiastically lauding the future troubleshooting they could do as a group, but that was all sorts of boring. Some days Box really wished Page didn't have that laptop, though the idea of listening to him stuttering through his speeches of happiness was even worse. So in an effort not to die, Box and Taiko had taken to flicking pieces of paper at Akira then pointing accusingly at Daruma when she looked over, fists already clenched. Besides, at least Box was making an effort; Izumu hadn't even moved from her computer and Box could see at least four shell sessions open.

"...more time passing out pamphlets in the maid café. In conclusion, my sexuality is in question and I am picturing Box naked right now."

There was a pause. It was awkward.

"W-w-w-w-wait!" Page said without aid of his computer. "I d-d-d-didn't type th- that."

Daruma stuck his face over the laptop lid and nodded. "There's only boring stuff written there," he confirmed.

"Hey!" Page said.

"Maybe just a glitch in the voice decoding," Taiko ventured. "Try putting in something else."

Akira leaned over Page's shoulder to watch him type. "The electricity bill for this month was lower than expected and the water bill was average. I only agree to Daruma's undercover cosplay ideas so I can watch Box will change his clothes in front of me. Because I want his body," the laptop speaking in Page's voice added helpfully.

"Okay, he definitely didn't type that," Akira said.

Taiko looked panicked. "That's a little specific for a software glitch. Do you think someone is plotting something against us? There's an enemy in our midst!"

"An enemy who wants Page and Box to get it on?" Akira said doubtfully.

"WHAT?" shouted Box.

"It's a c-c-c-conspiracy!" stuttered Page. "Okay, we have to act quickly and fuh- fuh- find the evil, evil, b-b-b-bad p-p-person. You know what that means! P-p-p-p-planning--"

Izumu swiveled around in her chair. "I did it."

"What? You did this?" Box repeated, eyes wide as saucers.

She lifted an eyebrow. "Of course I did. I modified Taiko-san's voice software so that Page-san's thoughts and feelings would also incorporate themselves into the things he typed. Is there a problem?"

"So that means," Box said slowly, desperately wanting to change his gloves even though he didn't need to for over an hour, "that Page actually wants my-- I mean, the things that computer said are actually true?!"

"Of course," Izumu said, looking at Box like he was stupid. "Do you need to have your eyes checked, Box-san?"

Box's mouth opened and closed, but he couldn't seem to get his voice to work. And he couldn't even look at Page, who was making some very strange clicking sounds. An uncomfortable silence fell over headquarters, not counting the clicks.

Finally, Akira put a hand on Izumu's shoulder. "You probably should put the software back the way it was. That's an invasion of Page's privacy," she said gently.

"That's a terrible thing to do!" Taiko said, nodding emphatically.

"That's gay," Daruma said, which summed things up nicely.

Page started typing very quickly, loud enough that Box could hear Page's fingers slam against the keys:

"I WONDER WHAT COLOR UNDERWEAR BOX HAS ON," the laptop yelled.

"Green," Box replied unthinkingly. "I mean! Wait!"

"Okay, that he typed," Akira said.

"EHHHHH?"

END.